Author: Capt Bill

🎨 CRITICAL VIOLATION: Sidewalk Chalk Exceeding 12 Square Feet – Immediate Action Required 🎨 Issued by: EMWV HOA Aesthetic Compliance Division Date: October 5, 2025 Priority: IMMEDIATE ENFORCEMENT The HOA Board has identified a serious aesthetic violation: sidewalk chalk art exceeding the approved 12 square foot limit. This threatens community property values and visual harmony.…

🍋 EMERGENCY NOTICE: Unlicensed Lemonade Operations – Zero Tolerance Policy 🍋 Issued by: EMWV HOA Business Compliance Division Date: October 8, 2025 Classification: CRITICAL ENFORCEMENT The HOA Board has identified a serious threat to community order: unlicensed lemonade operations. These illegal businesses pose significant risks to public health, safety, and property values. 🚫 ZERO TOLERANCE…

🚪 CRITICAL ALERT: Garage Door Open Time Limits – 30-Minute Maximum 🚪 Issued by: EMWV HOA Security & Safety Division Date: October 10, 2025 Priority: URGENT COMPLIANCE REQUIRED The HOA Board has identified a critical security vulnerability: garage doors left open for extended periods. This poses a serious threat to community safety and property values.…

🔔 URGENT NOTICE: Wind Chime Noise Ordinance – Maximum 3 Chimes Per Property 🔔 Issued by: EMWV HOA Audio Compliance Division Date: October 12, 2025 Classification: MANDATORY COMPLIANCE Recent complaints about excessive wind chime activity have prompted the HOA Board to implement strict new regulations. The community’s peace and quiet must be preserved at all…

🌿 MANDATORY POLICY UPDATE: Garden Hose Coiling Direction Requirements 🌿 Issued by: EMWV HOA Landscaping Compliance Division Date: October 15, 2025 Effective: IMMEDIATE After extensive research and community feedback, the HOA Board has determined that garden hose coiling direction is a critical safety and aesthetic concern. All residents must comply with the new mandatory coiling…